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Team Communication

Hogs, Logs and Hot Dogs—Who Participates in Remote Meetings?

March 22, 2021 by Matt Schlegel Leave a Comment

Having worked with remote teams and online meetings for the past 25 years,  I’ve struggled through the many problems that arise—language issues, time-zone issues, technical issues, and making sure everyone is heard.  In the Before Times—before the Covid-19 Pandemic—people often had a choice whether or not to choose work with remote meetings.  If they liked it, they did it. If they didn’t like it, they might move on to a more suitable work environment. Then suddenly the pandemic imposed remote work on many people, whether they liked that working style or not.  So, who likes remote meetings? Who doesn’t? And what happens to the remote workplace as the pandemic recedes? The answers to these questions may be revealed by the Enneagram’s subtypes and Temperament triads.

No Hogs, No Logs

One of the weekly meetings I attend has a standing rule—No Hogs, No Logs.  Attendees are expected to participate (no logs) and not take over the meeting (no hogs.)  The fact that we even need this rule begs the question why some attend passively while others chime in at every opportunity.  I tend to fall into the latter category, so I find that I am continually checking myself and finding other ways to channel my desire to express myself. More on that later.

An Enneagram Analysis

The Enneagram is a powerful tool that describes nine personality dynamics.  I use this tool as the basis for the collaborative teamwork approach I describe in my book Teamwork 9.0.  Each of the nine types brings a distinct style to the meeting setting, and to remote meetings in particular.  Also, each will have a predisposition to assert themselves during the meeting.  Here is a brief overview of those inclinations:

Enneagram Type Tendency Hog or Log?

Will speak up if something isn’t right. Balanced as long as nothing is obviously wrong, otherwise will hog to focus on problem.

Tends to banter, creating personal connections. Will go with the flow, but if there’s silence, will use the time to create connections which can appear as hogging.

Wants to maintain progress towards the goal and may take an opportunity to shine. Balanced as long as the team is making progress, otherwise will hog to get and keep things on track.

Reserved but chimes in, especially on emotionally impactful conversations. Tends to log but varies depending on their feelings about the topic.

Tends to watch and listen. Will speak if spoken to. Log unless expected to speak.

Tends to watch and listen, alert for potential problems. Balanced if no potential pitfalls, otherwise will hog to focus on a foreseeable problem.

Think it, say it!  Freely shares thoughts and works to maintain a positive experience. Tends to fill any silence with fun, positive conversations which can appear as hogging.
Wants to get to the point to end the meeting and get back to work but will challenge perspectives that differ from their own. Balanced if the meeting is in control but will hog if meeting goes out of control.
Will watch and listen quietly but may chime in to ward off a possible conflict. Log unless they feel compelled to mediate a conflict.

Temperament Triads

Another way to look at the disposition of the nine Enneagram types in a meeting setting is to examine Enneagram’s Temperament triads.  I review these triads in Chapter 7 of Teamwork 9.0.

Types 3-7-8 – Assertive Types – Tending to Hog

Types 1-2-6 – Compliant Types – Tending towards balance

Types 4-5-9 – Withdrawing Types – Tending to Log

Assertive Types 3, 7 and 8 may have a tendency to hog, Withdrawing Types 4, 5 and 9 may have a tendency to log, while  Compliant Types 1-2-6 may be more balanced.  While these inclinations fit a standard understanding of the Enneagram types, they do not explain the wide range of behaviors I commonly see in meetings.  For instance, the Type 6 description does not explain my own tendency to jump in with questions or comments at every opportunity.  There must be something more…

But Wait, There’s More: Enneagram Subtypes

People with a given Enneagram type can exhibit a wide range of dispositions and behaviors. The subtypes have been developed as a tool to explain behavioral variations within a given Enneagram type, with three subtypes for each of the nine types. They are Self Preservation, Sexual (One-on-One), and Social.  Mario Sikora uses different words to describe these same subtypes: Preserving, Transmitting, and Navigating. I like Sikora’s words, so I will use them here. The Preserving subtypes strive to maintain personal security, safety and wellbeing. The Navigating subtypes focus on being a member of a group or community. And the Transmitting subtypes project themselves and build intimate relationships.

Subtypes in Meetings

Navigating subtypes are naturals in meetings.  They are adept at social interaction, fitting into the group and creating a sense of belonging.  Preserving types are less concerned with fitting in and more concerned with their own safety and security.  They’ll take a back seat and may not speak up unless their safety and security are threatened. That leaves the Transmitting types who like to project themselves into the conversation and may try to take it over.  Based on that we could generalize the following:

Transmitting Subtypes – Tending to Hog

Preserving Subtypes – Tending to Log

Navigating Subtypes – Tending towards balance

Now, if we consider both the inclinations of the three Temperament triads and the three subtypes, we would get a diagram that looks like the following with those shaded in red tending to hog, those in blue tending to log and those unshaded tending towards balance.

Hogs and Logs — Behavioral Tendencies in Meetings due to Enneagram Temperament Triads and Subtypes

I like this model because it accounts for the variations among each type based on both the Temperament triad and the subtype, giving a wide range of possible behaviors in meetings.

I’m Transmitting!

In spite of the fact that I am Type 6 in the Compliant triad, this model certainly explains my inclination as a Transmitting subtype to want to engage continuously in the meeting.  Thank goodness for the chat function!  I use chat extensively to have side conversations with other participants—One-on-One—which satisfies my subtype need without hogging the single audio channel of the remote meeting. Relatedly, I recall attending a management retreat once and during one of the talks I asked a few questions (satisfying both my Type 6 questioning and my subtype transmitting.) Later I received feedback that I was being a “hot dog.” I suppose in that setting I was expected to be a cold log!

How does your Enneagram type and subtype affect your participation in meetings?  Do you tend to be a Hog, a Log, or somewhere in between? Do you find yourself interacting with the group, focusing on one-one conversations, or checking out all together? Are you looking forward to resuming in person meetings or would you prefer to continue meeting remotely?

Filed Under: Enneagram, Team Communication

I am 2% Neanderthal

September 2, 2020 by Matt Schlegel 2 Comments

The 23 and Me result that surprised me the most was my ancestry from 40,000 years ago. Testing positive for 281 Neanderthal variants out of 1,436, I am more Neanderthal than 56% of 23 and Me customers. What I learned next shattered everything I thought I knew about my ancient ancestor.

You Neanderthal

When I was kid growing up, calling someone a Neanderthal was not intended as flattery.  My belief about Neanderthals was that they were, well, stupid.  Clearly, Neanderthals did not survive because Homo sapiens outsmarted them, right?  Every school kid knew that, so it must be right—Right!?!

Not So Fast

It turns out that our schoolyard common sense may not have been correct.  Rutger Bregman in his book Humankind—A Hopeful History provides an alternate model.  Looking at the fossil record, Neanderthals had relatively bigger brains than Homo sapiens.  It’s likely that they were smarter than us.  They were also bigger than us.  So, if they were smarter and bigger, why isn’t the world populated with Neanderthals rather than Homo sapiens?

Lone Wolf

Bregman draws the analogy between wolves and domesticated dogs.  In general wolves are bigger and smarter than dogs, but there are many more dogs than wolves.  Why?  Because dogs are fun, kind and delightful, and we want them around.  Bregman makes the argument that Homo sapiens were the cuddly puppies of the hominid world, and Neanderthals probably liked having us around. They may have protected us.  And, according to my 23 and Me results they mated with us.  But that alone wouldn’t explain why there are so many of us and none of them.

Network Effect

Although Homo sapiens may not have been as smart as Neanderthals, Bregman asserts that we possess a capability that the Neanderthals did not—the ability to share information and learn from one another.  While those smart Neanderthal individuals were trying to figure out things for themselves, Homo sapiens were happy to let one person figure it out and learn from them how to do it.  They would pass that information along to others in a veritable verbal network.  Social media has turbocharged our ability to share our thoughts.  Now, a single individual has the capability to share with millions (perhaps billions) of others. This trait that distinguished Homo sapiens from Neanderthals is as prevalent and important today as it was 40,000 years ago.

Gullible Puppies

While we Homo sapiens may be highly capable of accessing information from one another, we aren’t always good at discerning the information’s truth.  Our critical thinking skills may be compromised for the sake of us all going along to get along. Apparently, lacking the ability to consistently discern truth did not impede Homo sapiens ability to procreate and populate.  The Neanderthals may simply have been overwhelmed by their kind and talkative hominid pets.  Homo sapiens succeeded Neanderthals and spread themselves and their information – both truths and untruths – to every corner of the planet.

Not Invented Here

Once the wheel was invented, humans shared that information widely—no need to reinvent it, right? And yet we so often do just that.  Sometimes that tendency leads us to discovery and innovation. Sometimes it prevents us from accessing pre-existing solutions that would easily solve our problems. I must admit, I do love puzzling things out.  Sometimes I would rather figure something out for myself rather than research and learn from someone else.  When I feel that way, maybe it’s one of those 281 Neanderthal variants guiding me.  On the other hand, it has become exceedingly easy to access information online.  My phone is rarely out of reach and a quick search often leads me to an answer. Whether that answer is correct or not… Well, that’s a different story.  I wonder what my intelligent Neanderthal ancestors would think about my “smart” phone habits.

How do you balance your time between researching existing knowledge and attempting to invent on your own?  How do you determine the truthfulness of information you access, especially information that appears to be “common sense”?  What have been your epiphanies, the ones that have led you to change your perception of the world?

Filed Under: Team Communication

Mirroring 9.0—How to Build Rapport with Diverse Teams using the Enneagram

May 8, 2020 by Matt Schlegel 1 Comment

Birds of a feather flock together.  Why is that? Turns out, we are most comfortable being around people like ourselves.  How can leaders build diverse teams while still building rapport among teammates? The Enneagram provides an answer.

Rapport and Team Effectiveness

The Oxford dictionary tells us that rapport is a close and harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned understand each other’s feelings or ideas and communicate well.  But is rapport important for team effectiveness?  Do effective teams communicate well? Yes!  Do effective teams share and understand each other’s ideas? Yes!  Are they in a close and harmonious relationship?  Yes! Clearly, rapport is essential for effective teams.

Mirroring

Mirroring is a phenomenon that occurs when we communicate with others—it’s a natural rapport-building mechanism by which we reflect back verbal and nonverbal cues.  Those cues include posture, arm placement and speech patterns, among others. Have you ever noticed during a conversation that you’ve positioned your body in the mirror image of the other person?  That’s mirroring in action. You can learn more about mirroring here.   Mirroring is the way we tell the other person, “Hey, I’m like you; we’re birds of a feather.” It’s our instinctual method for building rapport.

Conscious Mirroring

Knowing the power of mirroring for rapport building, why not deliberately use this technique for increasing team effectiveness? For instance, when you are with someone who takes a relaxed posture and speaks slowly, you can deliberately relax and slow down your pace.  Conversely, if they sit up right and talk fast, you can do the same. Another simple way to mirror, is to repeat back someone’s idea to them before you respond.  Doing that, you are communicating that you listened, heard and understood their ideas.  By mirroring in these simple ways, you are making the other person feel more comfortable, thereby building trust and rapport.

Birds of an Enneagram Type

At an Enneagram workshop I conducted, I asked the group to think about their best friends in high school and guess what Enneagram type they are.  As we went around the room, the pattern became clear—most everyone concluded that their best friend was the same Enneagram type as themselves.  It’s easier to build rapport with someone whose Enneagram style is similar to our own.  But can we adjust our own style to build rapport with any other style?

Mirroring 9.0

Knowing the nine distinct Enneagram styles adds more arrows in your mirroring quiver.  When building rapport with someone whose style is the same as yours, easy-peasy, you can just be yourself.  When building rapport with other styles, learn to adjust your own style to accommodate and mirror their style.  Doing so will help you build rapport with that person.

Cut to The Chase

I am Enneagram Type 6, and I like putting my ideas into context when communicating. You can probably tell this from my writing style. Type 8s, on the other hand, just want to get to the point.  If they want context, they’ll ask for it. Otherwise, don’t bother. You’re just wasting their time.  Knowing that my Type-6 communication style does not match well with the Type 8’s style, I deliberately adjust my style—I just get to the point and wait for questions.  Letting the 8 lead the conversation will make them feel more comfortable, improve communication, and build rapport. 

Why So Many Questions!

Conversely, if a Type 8 communicates with a Type 6, the Type 8 will simply state the point.  The Type 6 will want to know the context and start asking questions (sometimes Type 6 is labeled the Questioner.)   Since the Type 8 will feel like they’ve already worked out everything, rehashing issues may annoy them.  Being a Type 6, I have to check my tendency to ask lots of questions with Type 8s.

Starting Point—Knowing Your Own Type

For both scenarios, the starting point for me was to know my own Enneagram type and associated communication tendencies. Once familiar with those, I was able to adjust my tendencies based on the preferences of the other types. By learning to match the communication styles of the others based on their Enneagram type, you will be building rapport with your teammates.

Mirroring 9.0—Rapport Building Communication Tips

While each Enneagram type represents a tapestry of behaviors, there are some simple tips you can use to improve communication with each type.

Enneagram Type 1—Acknowledge my desire to get things right; give me the information and time I need to do it.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 1 Teammates

Enneagram Type 2—Appreciate me for my contributions; provide me with new opportunities to help.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 2 Teammates

Enneagram Type 3—Recognize me for my accomplishments; show me ways I can continue to achieve.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 3 Teammates

Enneagram Type 4—Acknowledge my unique perspectives; engage me in conversations about emotions and feelings.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 4 Teammates

Enneagram Type 5—Recognize my deep knowledge and understanding of a subject; allow me to contribute my knowledge is safe ways.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 5 Teammates

Enneagram Type 6—Recognize my abilities to think about the future, plan and strategize; indulge me in conversations about what may happen.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 6 Teammates

Enneagram Type 7—Let me know how much you like me; let’s dream about new and fun things to do.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 7 Teammates

Enneagram Type 8—Acknowledge my desire to get things done; get to the point so I can get into action.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 8 Teammates

Enneagram Type 9—Acknowledge my ability to understand other’s perspectives; don’t push me to share my own.

How to Build Rapport with your Enneagram Type 9 Teammates

Knowing the Enneagram types of your teammates and practicing these tips will help you build rapport and trust with your teammates.

Employee Engagement

According to Gallup, in 2019, the percentage of “engaged” workers in the U.S. was 35%. Hey, lot’s of room for improvement!  And, what’s the number one reason why it’s so low?  Gallup finds that the relationship between the employee and the direct manager is responsible for 70% of low engagement. 70%!  Now we know what to work on—building rapport and trust!

The Leader Sets the Tone

As a leader who desires a highly effective team with a diversity of styles, building rapport with your teammates is crucial. Learning the different Enneagram styles of yourself and your teammates and learning how to mirror those styles is a rapport building technique that will help improve team effectiveness and achieve higher employee engagement. Sharing your rapport building tips with your teammates will serve as a model for the entire team to build a self-supporting and self-sustaining environment in which the entire team can thrive. I detail leadership traits and Enneagram at work in Teamwork 9.0.

What rapport building strategies are you using to improve team effectiveness and employee engagement?  How are you honing your rapport building skills?

Filed Under: Building Rapport, Enneagram, Leadership, Team Communication

Failure to Communicate—How to Make Every Mistake!

April 29, 2020 by Matt Schlegel Leave a Comment

Working from home in a virtual team environment is a veritable petri dish for miscommunication with your remote teammates. I’ve been working with remote teams for years, yet in the last two weeks I’ve managed to make every mistake in the book! Why am I making so many mistakes?

Here’s the sequence of events that led our virtual team off track and tips for how to improve team communication skills with your remote team members.

DAY ZERO

My creative team rolls out a new feature on our website which they report to me by email. They nicely enumerate 5 points in the email; I respond to four points and say I will respond to the last point later when I have time.

Later that day, I respond to the thread with a second email in which I enumerate three issues that need correction and include screenshots of two visual issues.

Mistake #1—My creative team typically is very responsive. They responded right away to my first email, but never responded to my second email.  I did not realize this, and thus did not follow up to ensure that the issues I described in the second email were understood.

TEAM COMMUNICATION TIP—Acknowledge receipt of important email; follow up to make sure important communications are received.

DAY SEVEN

I receive an email from my creative team reporting bug fixes.  One of the fixes corresponds with one of three issues I had identified. Examining the website, I noticed that they had fixed the second issue. 

Mistake #2—I did not follow up on the third issue. I assumed they were still working on it.

TEAM COMMUNICATION TIP —Don’t assume; do confirm!

DAY TEN

I receive an email from my creative team on a separate feature that they are implementing.  After responding to the contents of their email, I added an update which included a comment that I am looking forward to resolution on issue #3. They respond immediately and note that they are looking into issue #3.

Mistake #3—By adding my comment in response to an unrelated issue, I increase the likelihood of these unrelated issues becoming conflated. 

TEAM COMMUNICATION TIP —Create distinct emails for each issue so that email threads don’t become confused.

DAY ELEVEN

The creative team’s project manager informs me the following morning that they will address issue #3.  That afternoon she sends me an email saying that they do not see the issue and attach an image of what they do see.

Mistake #4—Late that night, I quickly scan my emails before going to bed.  I read the text but do not scroll down to see the image that they attached.  Had I looked at the image, I would have discovered that the two unrelated projects had indeed become conflated, and now we were looking at completely different things. The following day I am busy with other things and don’t get back to the email.

TEAM COMMUNICATION TIP —Read email when you are prepared to address it and/or schedule follow up. Avoid reading email right before bed.

DAY FIFTEEN

Not remembering the email from Day Eleven and repeating Mistake #3, I again bring up the issue in an unrelated email thread late Friday afternoon.  This time the project manager picks up the phone and calls me.  She resends the email she sent on Day Eleven which I read carefully for the first time and discover that we are looking at completely different features!  After a 15-minute conversation, we were on track to resolve the issue, perhaps for the first time in fifteen days.

TEAM COMMUNICATION TIP —Sometimes a quick phone conversation can save a lot of email back-and-forth.

Corona Brain

Being thrust into working remotely presents extraordinary virtual team communication challenges. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for those of you working from home for the first time and having to learn all the tips and tricks necessary for effective remote collaboration. On top of that learning curve, we are all dealing with the stresses of a global pandemic, being cooped up with others 24/7 or perhaps enduring the loneliness of being isolated. Perhaps we are having to care for kids and juggle home schooling.  The pressures are intense.

My creative team and I have been collaborating remotely for nearly 10 years.  We’ve never met in person. We’ve never zoomed. We’ve worked on dozens of projects. We practically read each other’s minds!  Even we are now susceptible to the distractions of these extraordinary circumstances. We are reminded that we need to slow down, read emails more carefully and be more patient with each other as we navigate these turbulent times.  We agreed to memorialize our commitments with this blog.

How are you developing team communication and collaboration best practices? What steps are you taking to stay focused on your teammates and improve your virtual team success factors? 

Filed Under: Team Communication

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